tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3164556861454970487.post5217972187041593965..comments2023-10-08T05:00:23.559-04:00Comments on Clarissa's Blog: The Adjustment Bureau: A ReviewClarissahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11027134365260069910noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3164556861454970487.post-39855396023572393842011-03-07T10:33:46.924-05:002011-03-07T10:33:46.924-05:00I don't believe relationships run a course. To...I don't believe relationships run a course. To me, that's a cliche--as if relationship were about passion and newness. I don't exactly think we should run around saying "it's hard work!" because that isn't quite right either. But I do think growth is painful. It ought to be a transient pain or maybe it isn't growth. But some pain is to be expected, just as some boredom (also transient) is to be expected. How do you find any of that out if you decide the relationship is running a course and boredom or pain means it's over?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3164556861454970487.post-65161359454955571082011-03-07T10:15:22.669-05:002011-03-07T10:15:22.669-05:00" if you need to work hard at *wanting* to st..." if you need to work hard at *wanting* to stay together, then you've run the course of the relationship."<br /><br />-My point exactly. My readers are way better than readers on most other blogs I know. :-)Clarissahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11027134365260069910noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3164556861454970487.post-51769913844061457662011-03-07T04:26:19.287-05:002011-03-07T04:26:19.287-05:00I'm not a big fan of romantic comedies either ...I'm not a big fan of romantic comedies either and issue you presented is one of the primary reasons of my distaste of the genre & most of the Hollywood production. Remember the dialogue in a car between the protagonists in Breakfast at Tiffany's?Sannchirhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13506487103506057665noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3164556861454970487.post-84242506965578434752011-03-07T03:22:50.317-05:002011-03-07T03:22:50.317-05:00I really don't understand the "relationsh...I really don't understand the "relationships are hard work" thing.<br /><br />To whom is this advice directed, and what does it mean?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3164556861454970487.post-59655980884517154532011-03-07T02:20:07.136-05:002011-03-07T02:20:07.136-05:00I saw that movie today as well. I also reacted to ...I saw that movie today as well. I also reacted to Elise leaving her fiancé in the courthouse with the thought, What kind of person would do that?<br /><br />The movie was better than I expected, though I being a huge Philip K. Dick fan had read the original story and knew some of what was coming, though the plot was changed significantly from the short story.<br /><br />Ebert's <a href="http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20110302/REVIEWS/110309994" rel="nofollow">review</a> summed it up well, I thought.<br /><br />About relationships being "work," if your relationship is work, you are doing it very wrong. I hate that platitude as well.<br /><br /><br />-MikeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3164556861454970487.post-59348941142715439402011-03-07T01:40:07.174-05:002011-03-07T01:40:07.174-05:00The last paragraph left me a little confused. Are ...The last paragraph left me a little confused. Are you saying relationships are hard work, or that they are not?<br /><br />Because I'll tell you this: my last partner was mildly bipolar and not on medication (he'd had had adverse reactions to two different kinds of prescibed drugs, and refused to put his mind to any more risks). And apart from the immense cultural differences, apparently I have quite a few 'aspie' traits (excellent normal communication skills -- something I lack inherently but worked super hard to acquire -- is what puts me outside the aspie bracket). And we were both poor, living in one of the US's most expensive cities (Boston). <br /><br />We were together for nearly 2.5 years, and despite our mental and financial and cultural handicaps, it really wasn't 'hard work'. Our relationship did have some spectacular lows corresponding to our own conditions. Some days, he'd be so down it felt like putting my face under the ocean floor just to reach him. On other days I'd screw up everything from making a sandwich for lunch to falling down the stairs, to not being able to make my very basic phone work, and then get thoroughly frustrated with myself and the world. But for all our patience and affection with each other's problems, neither of us felt we were "working hard" to keep the actual relationship going. This is perhaps unrealistic of me, but I grew up in a very happy home with parents who are effortlessly happy together, and that coupled with my own relationships have left the firm impression that if you need to work hard at *wanting* to stay together, then you've run the course of the relationship.<br /><br />Is this what you were saying, or the opposite?Rimihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04344200811838569151noreply@blogger.com