Friday, December 11, 2009
I'm So Sorry for Poor Tiger Woods
Of course, if the initial Barbie doll divorces him, he will lose most of his hard-earned money. As a result, he must now withdraw from playing golf and dedicate himself to mending fences with the Barbie doll # 1 who is using this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to renegotiate her prenuptial agreement. Imagine what kind of an individual races to see her attorney as soon as she gleefully discovers that now she has the perfect excuse to milk her rich and famous husband for even more money.
Tiger Woods had to issue a statement that sounds beyond hilarious to my non-American ear. It starts as follows: "I am deeply aware of the disappointment and hurt that my infidelity has caused to so many people." I haven't heard anything quite so insane for a while. People who can be "hurt" by the infidelity of some one they have no relationship with are not normal. They need to go and get a life immediately.
These celebrity marriages are a total joke. They revolve around nothing other than money, fame, prestige, and who gets to milk the rich person for more cash. It sickens me that the very people who follow these stories on the news with so much dedication preach about the sanctity of marriage and vote against gay rights. Come on, people. Sanctity of marriage, my ass.