Monday, January 17, 2011

Homeschooling as a Form of Child Abuse

I have been asked by several people to share my opinions on homeschooling. Well, what can I say about this atrocious practice that cripples children socially and intellectually in order to serve the needs of fanatically religious, racist, or socially unadapted parents? When I first heard about this practice, I couldn't believe that a civilized country would allow such a huge percentage of children to be deprived of the benefits of secondary education. A free, all-inclusive system of compulsory primary and secondary education is one of the most crucial inventions of the Enlightenment. The enlightened thinkers of the 18th century see a human being as a work in progress, as a project of self-betterment and acquisition of knowledge. In order to be good citizens and full-fledged human beings, we need to engage in a constant process of getting educated.

Homeschooling parents, however, couldn't care less about their children's well-being and whether these kids will be able to inscribe themselves into a society inspired by the ideals of the Enlightenment*. All they want is to cannibalize their children's existences in order to conceal from themselves their own grievous incapacity to participate in everything our society has to offer. Such parents are lost in the stream of changes that accompanies our transition to modernity. They are confused by and terrified of everything that's going on around them and wish to make their children feel as miserable, confused and unadapted as they do.

Parents who homeschool can be subdivided into three groups** which can, of course, overlap:
  1. Religious fanatics who don't want their children to be "contaminated" by the secular beliefs of their classmates and teachers. Obviously, these people have no faith in their own religion if they think that it's so easy to tempt their kids away from it. If you need to lock yourself up at home to avoid temptation, you must find said temptation to be extremely attractive.
  2. Racists who hate the idea of desegregation. These folks (I don't really want to call them "people" because racism, in my opinion, makes one less than human) only homeschool because their racism drives them in everything they do. Who cares if their children grow up to me maladjusted, unintelligent, intellectually challenged little racists? As long as there are no black or brown people around them, the racists have achieved their goal.
  3. Bored housewives who need to justify their lack of occupation. It's really paradoxical that the process of educating children should often be entrusted to people who failed most signally in terms of academic achievement and socialization. Taking into account that housewives are also the group that suffers the most from depression, we have a sad picture of kids being taught by somebody who is perennially depressed, is not developing intellectually (reading Nora Roberts doesn't count as intellectual development) and has failed to achieve anything professionally or socially.
Homeschooled children are disadvantaged in a variety of ways. They are robbed of academic success because all they are taught to do is answer the inane questions of standardized tests like trained little monkeys. All such tests achieve is stunting intellectual development. Proponents of homeschooling tout the homeschooled kids' capacity to succeed on these standardized tests as one of the advantages of homeschooling. Their lack of intelligence prevents them from realizing that this skill is just as valuable as knowing how to jump through hoops. Which I'm sure their miserable children also know how to do really well. Deprived of a chance to learn how to take initiative, these kids are nothing but little, brainwashed parent-pleasers.

Students who attend school can counterbalance the stupefying effects of standardized tests with the help of everything else that is available to them at school (discussions with classmates and teachers, listening and responding to the opinions of others, development of critical skills). None of this is within the reach of a child locked up at home with a religious fanatic, a racist or an unfulfilled housewife. I'm sure nobody will argue that representatives of these groups end up being the most authoritarian parents you can imagine. Their poor children get no opportunities to learn to form opinions of their own, let alone express them.

Of course, children don't go to school only to acquire knowledge. School prepares us for the workplace and helps us build our social identities. There is a plethora of daily situations, conflicts, issues among students and teachers, students and administrators, students of different age groups, etc. that a regular student has to negotiate and resolve on a daily basis. These social skills are crucial to one's success in the workplace. You can't stick a person into college at 18 and expect them to catch up in terms of social skills that normal children acquire over 12 formative years of their lives. Being in school differs from any other interactions that can be offered to homeschooled children in that it is structured, it involves discipline, responsibility, dealing with authority, a schedule.

Parents who homeschool for racist, fanatical or selfish reasons that I listed here are incapable of seeing their children as separate human beings. Their kids are nothing but objects who are expected to serve the parents' egotistical needs. As a result, homeschooled children are crippled intellectually and socially. If this isn't abusive, then I don't know what is.

* If you don't know why the US is the most successful of all enlightened projects, then I'm guessing you were homeschooled by an ignorant parent.

** Of course, there are also cases of disabled children who live in areas with no access to schools for children with disabilities. These are legitimate cases of homeschooling that are caused by an obvious lack of other options. Ideally, we will see our schools, universities and workplaces become more accessible to people with disabilities but, unfortunately, it will take a lot of time to see that happening.

320 comments:

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Anonymous said...

Sorry, Bridget, the 19 year old twins belong to me, the "Trainwreck Watcher". I don't believe their gender matters.

So, Sehkmet, what does their being adults have to do with my protecting them? No one said I was picking their graduate school, I simply said I would not let them attend one "Clarissa" teaches or advises at. That wasn't a decision I reached on my own, btw. Who do you think asked me to find out where she teaches after they read this blog post and laughed? They lead very busy lives so I was happy to find out. I also love that my adult children still include me and my husband, their father, in their choices. They don't have do, but because they lived an unschooled life, they see no reason not to. We don't have that authoritarian relationship most families have.

I find it ironic that while "Clarissa" seems unable to detach herself from her father's lap, you think I should not be part and parcel to protecting my offspring's best interest(s). It would be funny if it weren't so sad.

Finally, yes, "Clarissa" you absolutely posted as an authoritive figure, in fact you did so repeatedly. That really shouldn't be a big deal unless you refuse to back up the claim and/or completely deny it. The funny thing is (and maybe you don't know this), the only problem with claiming you're the smartest person in the room is when you leave the door open.

Try humility, it will get you more fans.

Clarissa said...

MORE fans? :-) I hardly have time to deal with the ones I have. :-) Please share with me how many people read your humble blog? Just to see how much popularity can be gained through humility. Thanks!

Clarissa said...

"I'm curious as to whether or not you'd be interested in speaking to another university professor who is choosing to home-school,"

-I'm sorry, I don't understand the question. I have talked to such colleagues, yes. Do you mean to ask if I'd like to talk to them some more? Or to some other colleagues? Or people I haven't met yet?

It feels like people have started leaving completely gratuitous comments with absolutely no meaning.

The request to move on from my own blog was especially strange. Do you guys really have nothing else to do than invest all this effort into helping me make money off the blog? :-) I mean, I'm grateful and all but it's still weird.

Unknown said...

I still recall standing in the coffee shop staffed by two public schoolers and two home schoolers when the cash register broke. The public schoolers couldn't make change without the assistance of a calculator or a home schooler while the two home schoolers made change and chatted with the customers. One of the home schoolers eventually bought the shop at 19 years old while attending college on academic scholarships and volunteering for a local political activist group. For an academician, your research is weak.

Clarissa said...

My area of academic research is modern and contemporary Spanish Peninsular literature. But I don't publish that research here, of course. this is a blog where I publish my personal opinions. Which is stated clearly in the blog's header.

Anonymous said...

You are right! You are absolutely free to have your opinion! I was just trying to see where you were coming from is all.

I have no desire to shut you up. I don't agree with a lot of what I"ve read in your blog, but I will stand up for your right to say it every single day of the week! I disagree with your views on homeschooling, feminism, and SAHMs, but if someone were to start saying that this blog should be closed, then I would be among the first to back you up and fight for you to be able to keep this blog and write whatever you want to on it.

I was just trying to get a better handle on the feminism thing with regards to the SAHM/homeschooling thing.

I assume it would be hard to see things (re: homeschooling/sahm) from both sides, if your ideas/views on feminism are so strongly leaning one way. My views on feminism are vastly different than yours, which is why I see women going off to work and putting their kids in daycare as a travesty, while you see moms who stay home and care for their kids as a travesty.

Different strokes, I guess. Good luck in everything!

Clarissa said...

"I find it ironic that while "Clarissa" seems unable to detach herself from her father's lap"

-You are right, we are a very close family. It's a cultural thing, so maybe that's why you find it hard to understand. My parents, sister, niece and aunt all live in a different country, but we talk on the phone every day, for hours, especially with my sister. My father and I also work on projects together. I find it impossible to understand how some people only talk on the phone once a week or once a month with their parents and siblings.

Having a warm, loving relationship is, however, really not the same as parents trying to make deicisions for their adult children. It's sad that you don't see the difference between love and control.

Clarissa said...

"I have no desire to shut you up. I don't agree with a lot of what I"ve read in your blog, but I will stand up for your right to say it every single day of the week!"

-Oh, I'm sorry, I really didn't mean you. Talking to you is a pleasure because it's intellectually stimulating. You are always welcome here to share your differing opinions. :-)

Anonymous said...

This person is not an academic - certainly not in any real sense. It's clear the primary reasons for the posts are to generate web traffic and controversy. I hope people will give this deliberate pot stirring of hatred toward "the other" all the attention it deserves - and perhaps pass the word on this very successful course of action to any Glenn Beck fans you know as well....

Anonymous said...

You've said it correctly in another post.....

"When even reading becomes yet another unwelcome but stoically survived chore, the future of education becomes very unpromising.

As teachers, we are to blame for this sad state of things just as much as anybody else. Often, university courses set as their main goal stuffing as much information as possible into the students' heads. In practical terms, this makes very little sense since most of the dates, numbers, and definitions that our students are asked to memorize can be easily found if needed through an Internet search engine. The most popular format for tests and mini-quizes - a multiple choice test - pointedly leaves no room for creativity. Students are given choices and the only thing they are expected to contribute is a tick next to the "correct" choice. As a result, students feel completely lost when the format of a test is a blank page that has to be filled with their own thoughts.

We have to remember that there is no intellectual achievement without ample leisure time. I know I have said it before, but this needs to be repeated as often as possible. You cannot be creative on a schedule. Ideas don't get generated because there is a deadline. Originality of thought escapes from people who routinely go on 5 hours of sleep. Let's stop teaching our students to parrot what we say and start teaching them to think for themselves."

While I agree that some homeschooling parents are doing it for the wrong reasons, there seem to be many who are doing it for the best interest of their children. There are a lot of co-op groups that simulate classrooms, so kids can still make friends through classes. I'm neither pro nor against, I just feel if you are to blog about it in a form other than a mere opinion, at least have the decency to acknowledge that homeschooling has many benefits that a public school lacks. There are pros and cons to both, and each are dependent on the student and the parents.

Clarissa said...

Anonymous: I can't acknowledge something I don't believe is true. I think it's horrible to force children to spend so much of their time under the gaze of a parent. I think this prevents them from forming their own, separate identities. I think it's wrong to deprive them of an opportunity to learn to function in a structured environment where they are one of many rather than the center of the universe. I know how it feels to be looked after by a group of adoring adults until the age of 7 and then have to learn ways to be part of a group, interact within a collective environment. When I started school at that age, I was years behind my classmates in terms of communication skills. It was extremely traumatic. I had no idea how to inscribe myself into hierarchies, how to be my own person.

If I'd been kept away from school for 10 more years, I'd be completely crippled socially.

"I just feel if you are to blog about it in a form other than a mere opinion"

-Once again, in the blog header it is stated very clearly that everything you see here are my opinions. What on Earth made you think I was trying to "blog about it in a form other than a mere opinion"??

Anonymous said...

"Who organizes "Park day?" Who decides when it starts and finishes. This may be an enjoyable outing for all, but it is scheduled and regimented to fit your home school group. I do hope this is not replacing independent play time. The kind where a kid meets a friend without a parent meeting said friend before or at the same time. The kind of play that comes from hanging out with other kids in the neighborhood and results in your child calling through the door to mom/dad, "I'm going bike riding with Tom, when do I have to be back?" or "I'm going to Julie's to play video games, see you at supper." This type of play is much more independent than "Park day." It occurs completely independent of parents other than permission to go and when it is necessary to return. It would be nice if the time of return is far enough away to allow the kid to come back of their own accord, before required sometimes, at least on weekends."

Well, for us a "Park Day" is a great opportunity for my children to see friends. We live in the country, on a street without children. My children ARE the only children on the street. Yes, there are plenty of other children in the area, but at tender ages of 6, 4, and 2 they are not going to be allowed to simply take off. Again...black and white...this as well as homeschooling in general...are NOT black and white.

Melissa N. said...

Hi again, just wondering your opinion on children who travel all the time with their military families and they really have less of a choice of good public schools than the US..what's your feeling on those families who homeschool?

Also what about the children who are too sick to go to school and need to be homeschooled for medical reasons? (ie cancer for example) what's your take on that...

Thanks in advance!

Clarissa said...

"Also what about the children who are too sick to go to school and need to be homeschooled for medical reasons? (ie cancer for example) what's your take on that..."

-With all due respect, this question is answered explicitly within the post. Is it too much to ask that people at least read the post they are responding to?

Clarissa said...

""Who organizes "Park day?" Who decides when it starts and finishes. This may be an enjoyable outing for all, but it is scheduled and regimented to fit your home school group."

-How come people are responding to a deleted post?

Anonymous said...

Wow, how close-minded this is! I'm disgusted actually.

Anonymous said...

@SAMinIL Even in winter there are a few hardy kids on my block that play outside. Usually the kids are 7 and above and yes I do see this often looking out my front window and driving around.

I have seen and read news reports about scheduling problems faced by families. Perhaps you are over scheduling. Are all these extracurricular activities really necessary for child development? For most of the history of education children have had more free time, it is relatively recently(30 or so years) that this over scheduling phenomena has developed.

There are a number of articles by psychologists warning of the hazards of over scheduling. One of the hazards I hadn't thought of is "an unspoken criticism of their (the child's abilities)." Maybe in your neighborhood there are a lot of over scheduled children.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, Clarissa, I'm not one of those 15 minute refreshers. I will refresh more often, I'm still kind of new to blogging and the speed that new comments come in. However do you keep up with it all?

Nichole "Nikki" Warren said...

sehkmet-Oh, I don't doubt that the kids in my neighborhood and local community are over scheduled. I am often sadden when I hear parent calling teachers and asking for extensions on homework or my neighbor telling me she had no choice but stop at McD the other night because she had to take her kids here, there, and everywhere.

Even on what are "no school days" such at MLK day this passed Monday, my kids are the only one in the neighborhood just playing outside.

Often I have to tell my friends, neighbors, and others, just name a date and time and we can be there, because we honestly are that flexible.

Melissa N. said...

I did try to keep up on all the posts, however, I must have missed the comments on the children who are homeschooled because they are too sick to attend school outside their home...can you please direct me towards that part.

In addition, did you address my question on the military families and their lack of good public or private schools across the world which is why a lot of them homeschool.

You seem very hostile towards just normal questions that I am very interested in learning your "take" on them.

Clarissa said...

melismama: It's not in the comments, it's in the post itself. I'll copy what I said there: "Of course, there are also cases of disabled children who live in areas with no access to schools for children with disabilities. These are legitimate cases of homeschooling that are caused by an obvious lack of other options. Ideally, we will see our schools, universities and workplaces become more accessible to people with disabilities but, unfortunately, it will take a lot of time to see that happening."

Of course, it's frustrating when people leave literally hundreds of comments about how much they hated a post, and then I see that the hated post haven't even been perused.

As for military families, I have never heard from the military families I know that any of them homeschooled. I can ask around some more, maybe anybody can point me to such a family.

Clarissa said...

sehkmet: I receive all comments automatically on my cell phone. Otherwise, this wouldn't have been possible.

I'm very happy to have you as a reader.

Denise Smith said...

What still baffles me is why people think a decision like homeschooling is made spur-of-the-moment. It isn't like getting up and deciding, "I'll wear the blue shirt, today." or an impulse buy at the checkout. We research homeschooling extensively and discuss it with at least our spouse, if not others who share our concern for our child(ren)'s well being.

Most of the homeschool parents I know thought long and deeply about whether or not to homeschool, and much more thought on which route to take. Most of them (that I know) would be concerned if one or more of their children asked to go to school, but they would not keep their child from attending school. Many homeschooled children *have* chosen school. A lot have returned to homeschooling, some have opted to remain in school.

This is a decision most of us make because it is best for each child, not because of a social judgement or religious doctrine or to control the minutia of what our children are exposed to.

It is really sad that the knee-jerk reaction in the USA is to hate or disparage whatever is different or misunderstood. I don't understand why it is so difficult for Americans to "agree to disagree".

Ioana said...

Your generalised slur against housewives is offensive and doesn't even contribute any addition to the argument. Some of your replies to comments seems to be of the "you are angry with my post, what more could you expect from the 'semi-literate hysterical housewives'" variety. Shame. It's name calling and it detracts from discussing the merit of a comment. I refuse to base my idea of a comments post on the profession of the writer.

This doesn't provoke discussion on the issue.

Clarissa said...

"This doesn't provoke discussion on the issue."

-Seriously? Have you by any chance noticed the 221 comments before yours? Could you maybe point me to a more animated discussion on an issue that you have made happen< since you seem to know so much about provoking discussions.

Anonymous said...

Have you ever attended a public school in Florida? The condition of the schools are deplorable. We homeschool for this reason only.

I was active in my children's public school education but it was just bad. The entire school experience was bad. I truly felt that I had no other choice.
I looked at the private schools but in all honesty, they were no better. And most were very religious with more of a focus on religion than education.
I was educated in the Northeast. I heard that the education in the South was bad, but couldn't wrap my brain around just HOW bad. It's shocking. Really.
We plan to move back to the Northeast. I'm hoping the economy turns around enough to allow us to get out of our house very soon. In the meantime, we homeschool. And like many other homeschoolers I truly feel like it is the ONLY option.

NYCitymomx3 said...

Wow, that's probably the funniest piece of ignorance I've ever read. Thanks for the laugh.

toolazytosignin said...

Calrissa: "I receive all comments automatically on my cell phone. Otherwise, this wouldn't have been possible."

And you haven't lost your mind yet? That is impressive.

reagan said...

I'm interested in knowing your opinion of states that offer public school curricula online with the involvement of a state-certified teacher/mentor. If the educational content is the same, do you consider this child abuse? Or is your opinion that it is child abuse only because the child is receiving his or her education at home?

And what of a child who lives within a poor school district (e.g., Cleveland Metropolitan School District is one of the worst in the country)? Is a parent who cannot afford private school, and chooses instead to homeschool, also subjecting his or her child to systematic abuse?

Clarissa said...

Please read the post to which you are responding. It has answers to all your questions. Do you regularly respond to posts without reading them?

Anonymous said...

"-I'm not lobbying to pass the legislation that will make such a choice illegal. I am simply expressing my opinion about such a choice. To do so is an unalienable right I have under this country's constitution. People who want to shut me up demonstrate their profound disrespect for the Constitution of the United States. Or maybe just their ignorance of it." -By Clarissa

I for one do NOT want to shut you up. How else would people get to witness first-hand YOUR ignorance of homeschooling?

Clarissa said...

I know this will come as a huge shock but not every comment that is made on this planet is about you. You are not the center of the universe. Sad, I know.

kelly said...

This post is depressing to read. It also reeks of ignorance with regards to homeschooling. In fact, enough ignorance I'm not sure how I'd go about addressing it.

"School" is the new construct, not living life with our children. There are many wonderful blogs out there where you can learn more if you're interested. It is sad to me you say you are "not an authority" on homeschooling but when others invite you to read their blogs you call them "push[y]" "unsocialized, self-centered housewives who have no idea how to interact with people".

Most mothers I've met, schooling or not, are quite well adjusted to interacting with others; most I've met are very respectful about sharing ideas, even ideas we are not familiar with or end up not incorporating into our lives.

Best of luck!

Clarissa said...

"It is sad to me you say you are "not an authority" on homeschooling but when others invite you to read their blogs you call them "push[y]" "unsocialized, self-centered housewives "

-I didn't see any "authorities on homeschooling" invite me to their blogs. Or is a person who engaged in a practice necessarily an authority? If I read a book in French, will I become an authority on French literature?

"Most mothers I've met, schooling or not, are quite well adjusted to interacting with others; most I've met are very respectful about sharing ideas, even ideas we are not familiar with or end up not incorporating into our lives."

-What a pity none of them came to this discussion! Maybe they have better things to do with their lives that stalk people on-line.

Kim said...

Sorry to disappoint, but as a homeschool graduate my family did not fit into any of your 3 groups.

My parents gave homeschooling a try at the suggestion of my older brother's 4th grade teacher. He was struggling in school, but thrived at home. Because of his good experience my parents decided to continue homeschooling us both.

I had a great experience with homeschooling. We were really active, outgoing, social, etc. I had friends (both homeschooled and public schooled) of all different races and religions. Each family in our homeschool group had a different reason for choosing home education.

Once I reached highschool-age most of my homeschooled peers were taking classes at the local community college. This was an advantage when they went on to college full-time after graduation and had already built up college credits. We've all gone on to be happy successful people with careers and families of our own.

While I'm sure my parents wish I shared their options, I often do not. My political, religious, and philosophical views differ greatly from those of my parents. They realize I'm my own person though so this has not harmed our relationship in the least.

I'm not sure where you have gotten your ideas about homeschooling...but I do not find that it is accurate view of the homeschool community.

Bob Collier said...

This is nothing to do with homeschooling really, is it? It's about people you hate because they're not like you.

I sympathise entirely. I think we all go through something like that at some point in our lives.

Then we grow up.

Clarissa said...

So are you planning to stick around until I "grow up" or will you people finally move on?

I'm getting the feeling that for some folks this post is the central event of their lives in a long time. Is there really nothing better you'd rather be doing with your lives? Nothing at all?

If I chance upon a post that I honestly believe is completely ignorant and misguided, it wouldn't even occur to me to spend so much time and effort on it.

Lynn said...

It's pathetic how ignorant you truly are with your biased, judgmental and ridiculous post here.
I can not believe I am wasting my time responding to you, but I felt the need to comment on how dense you must be to produce such verbal diarrhea.

Good luck in life.

Anonymous said...

Hm. You're an interesting read, Clarissa. I don't know that I've run across anyone with quite this wide a range of controversial opinions. You seem to defy categorization. I mean this as a compliment.

I am a parent who homeschools so clearly I disagree with this particular opinion even as I agree on other issues you have raised on your blog. I find that fascinating...and rare.

My hope would be that your intention in your posts is not merely to be controversial or combative for the sake of being controversial and combative. That being said, it's your blog. You're entitled to your own little corner of the internet to speak your mind, I suppose.

Clarissa said...

Finally, a reasonable, intelligent comment! Thank you, mrsmetaphor, you are restoring my faith in humanity here.

Anonymous said...

My goodness, what an uninformed, non-progressive thinker YOU are! Home educators are amongst the most diverse, widely read, equipped thinkers of the modern age, and it will be their children, who are able to think for themselves, who will be the world leaders in generations to come.

It sounds like you have only been exposed to a very small microcosm of a very large world-wide community of very healthy individuals and families from around the world. Enlarge your world, my dear - even home educators can be well-balanced and delightful people.

Jessica said...

Sorry, I didn't read all the comments because there's so many.

But the thing that struck me the most odd about your post, is the comment about standardized testing, since it's the opposite of any homeschooling family I know. Homeschoolers LOATHE testing, and rally against it constantly, for the same reasons you mentioned. Very odd indeed that you think they think the opposite. Lol.

Bob Collier said...

"So are you planning to stick around until I "grow up" or will you people finally move on?"

LOL

But, Clarissa, you don't want us to move on. Not really. Do you? If we don't stick around until you win, what was the point of you sharing your opinion with the internet?

I just hope it doesn't turn out like that anti-homeschooling blog post last year, that's all. I gave up after about three weeks - more than 800 anti-blog post comments by then and they were still coming in. Holy cow! What a waste of the woman's time and energy and, the thing is, the homeschoolers were loving it. Gifted a soapbox. What could be more fun?

Clarissa said...

As somebody who has been subjected to the equivalent of homeschooling for a while as a child, I have already lost, Bob. And there are things that I lost that I still haven't been able to recover. I just feel sorry for other people who undergo similar experiences.

800 comments? Wow, I now know how Marcos Moulitsas feels. :-)

Of course, the homeschholers are loving it. They obviously don't have anything else to do. One person pressed the Refresh button on this post 600+ times. In a single day.

You personally are welcome to stick around here, though.

Bob Collier said...

Oh yes, that was the other thing. I have a vague recollection of reading an article once called "Schooling Is A Form Of Child Abuse". "Is" not "as". Perhaps I can track it down. That was a very interesting point of view too. To be honest, I gave up reading articles about school (for my newsletter), I was starting to find them very depressing.

So, if homeschooling is child abuse and schooling is child abuse, what's the world left with, I wonder?

Learning, I guess. Such a comfort to know it's always there under the surface of its many guises.

Bob Collier said...

Had to Google Marcus Moulitsas. Where would I be without Google? Not so well educated I think.

Clarissa said...

And he gets REALLY scary troll comments and threats. Mine are child's play in comparison.

"So, if homeschooling is child abuse and schooling is child abuse, what's the world left with, I wonder?

Learning, I guess. Such a comfort to know it's always there under the surface of its many guises."

-Very well said. :-)

Amber said...

I would have agreed with you a couple years ago (well except for the racist reasons for homeschooling since I haven't ever met anyone who admitted that as a reason) but then I started meeting "normal" families who are homeschooling. Highly educated parents who decided to homeschool for the 4th reason that you are missing: that they truly believe they can provide a better and more well-rounded education than their public schools. Given, I live in a large city where the public school system is truly broken. I'm sure in other areas it is a different story. Anyway, I do think there is a 4th category. I assure you we don't fall into any of your other three.

Clarissa said...

I hope you are right, Amber. I really hope you are. After being virtually stalked by people from this thread of comments and after receiving some actual threats from them, I don't find it easy to believe, though. I have never encountered such a degree of collective hysteria in any discussion before this. And there have been some controversial discussions on other subjects too.

But, once again, I hope you are right.

Anonymous said...

"He's actually learning now that I've brought him out of the public school system (where I still continued to volunteer for two years). His classroom now consists of not only our home, but the car, the zoo, the grocery stores, the library, the mall, friends' houses, the city, nature and wherever else we go."

I went to school, yet I did also go to the zoo, the store, the library, friends' houses, the city and to the park... Are kids that go to school usually prevented from being taken to the park or friends' houses?

And with a higher income that comes from two parents there are many more opportunities for the child to travel the world and to be exposed to things and places a tiny bit more appealing than the car and the mall. :)

Anonymous said...

Hey you forgot to mention government conspiracy theorist like me!! I don't want public schools brain washing my kids! I really don't care what you think of me. I'm not only a successful product of home schooling. (only had problems with being suicidal when I went back into public school from the amount of bullying I received, and came straight back into home school.) But I am also a house wife. I have more class more dignity and am a cleaner person all around than those I know who went to public schools. That's right I had enough self respect to wait till I was married for sex. I do not nor have I ever done drugs nor drink. I am HIGHLY educated and continue to educate myself further any time my interest is tweaked in something. I have had professions comment on my high level of intelligence. Yes I AM Christian, but does that mean I dismiss anything in science? Absolutely not! Do I have the ability to think critically and form my own conclusions on things? You better believe it! And I will encourage my children to think critically as well, not just how to be a good test taker like public schools offer. Racist? Really? My best friend is black. My sister-in-law is black. And my nephews are bi-racial. And I love them all dearly! I myself, though may be white as snow, am a mutt. I'm a lovely mix of Scotch-Irish, Native American, and yes, African-American. YOU, my friend, are the one who seems to have not educated yourself in the culture of home school. And the fact you repeatedly compared home schoolers to pedophiles is sick and twisted. I fear you are the one with issues.
Virginia

Clarissa said...

I don't think anything of you. I don't know you. And I never compared homeschoolers to pedophiles. That is all your unhealthy projection.

Anonymous said...

i am not a home schooler. I havent the talent to put that much faith in myself to educate my child. with that said you will never make me believe that placing a child in a room with 40 children where there are dead lines and ever changing text books that they can and will change on the teachers and children half way through the year is the answer. We are over crowding our schools and laying off teachers cutting back on the budget but expect them to learn more when there are less tools to learn with. Art and music is gone. I believe most parents who home school want to teach their children more then just what a board of over paid members think the kids should know. But then again there is that pesky drop out rate. Funny that is a HUGE public school problem. we would much rather push social promotion as a answer then what would be in the childs best interest and lets not forget that we have to socialize the children maybe that is why there are day cares at the highschool. Or could that be the lack of parenting? Wait mom and dad cant parent because they are at work and dont have time. Yes home school is terrible 1 parent teaching the child what they need to learn building on their strength and using different methods that a teacher who has 35 kids cant do with out a decent budget and bus.

Thoughts of THAT mom said...

Just an FYI, recent studies report as many as 2 1/2 million homeschooling students in the US alone.

I am the first to stand in line and support someone's right to say something even if I don't agree with what they have said. I'll often ask why they believe as they believe; and answer the same in return if they ask.

I'm saddened that you have chosen to resort to name-calling and attempting to belittle people instead of engaging in a useful discussion. You had an excellent opportunity here which was quickly destroyed by your replies.

I honestly don't understand your views on feminism. I believe it is far more advanced to give people (men or women) the option to choose for themselves how they will live their lives rather than having it chosen for them. I understand the concept of only having the illusion of choice.

However, I don't think that is the case when one (whether a man or a woman) chooses to stay home.

Why would you think it better for a man or woman to not have the choice? You've not said that in so many words, but you have implied it by saying that only those who are uneducated and unfulfilled would choose to stay home. I see that as an assault to what feminists fought for!

Can you help me further understand your thoughts on this? Why would you think it better that they not have a choice? If that's not what you're saying, then what are you saying?

Scott Morizot said...

I don't disagree that homeschooling can be a result of any of the categories you list, but that list is hardly comprehensive.

When I read your second category, I had to chuckle. When I was a child in the 70s we moved to a farm in rural Mississippi for a period of time after the death of my stepfather. When my mother (who is a teacher, principal, art therapist, etc.) discovered the local schools were still segregated, she decided to homeschool my brother and me rather than place us in that environment. In effect, the opposite of your category. And I appreciate her conscious efforts (that wasn't the only one) to shield us as much as possible from absorbing the racism in our surrounding culture.

With that said, all my kids went to public school. In retrospect, I think there was a point when we should have pulled our older son out of school and homeschooled him at least for a season. That may have helped him more than trying to work with the school did. But the rest of our kids have all thrived in public school.

But homeschooling is an option for protecting a child from bullying and other dangerous environments that can arise in the context of our schools -- especially if nothing else seems to be working. And sometimes illness can make homeschooling a better option. So there's a wide array of reasons behind it. I don't tend to judge without actually knowing the circumstances.

Lynn said...

I find it amusing that you wouldn't post my comment. Is it because you truly could not form a rebuttal for what I said about public school teachers?

Truly, I would love to know your response. If the public schools are so great why are they churning out adults incapable of teaching their own children?

Again, snarky, childish comments are not necessary. I want you to actually answer my question like the educated adult you claim to be.

Incidentally, if you were not being such a coward and let the comments post immediately (instead of acting like the thought police, you would not be inundated with duplicate posts. The blogger system is not working properly.

Clarissa said...

Lynn: another comment of the "you are such a coward" variety, and you don't need to bother writing any more comments here again. They will not be posted.

As for your question, there is a welath of studies demonstrating that housewives lose a portion of their vocabulary and communcation skills for each year they stay out of workplace. No matter how well one might have done in school, this knowledge is gradually lost.

If you are planning to post comments in the future, please get yourself under control.

Clarissa said...

For everybody's information: posts are moderated for the following reasons:

1. Popular blogs get a lot of spam, and Blogger's spam-detection system is very weak. I don't want to have the threads inundated with posts on how to enlarge your penis and college degrees for sale.

2. Some posts are extremely racist, homophobic, anti-Semitic, etc. I have no interest in providing a platform for such hateful pronouncements.

Nichole "Nikki" Warren said...

Clarrissa- Do you have links (from unbiased sources) to those studies that have shown that housewives loose their vocabulary and communication skills when they choose to stay home? And that lost is at a rate GREATER then to those in the work place?

Also- As someone that has a blogspot blog with over 100 follower and over 150 feed readers it's important to moderate comments and not allow them to be published without the blog owners approval--especially if you want to keep your blog free of SPAM and links to the things that Clarissa mention in one of her last comments.

Clarissa said...

"Can you help me further understand your thoughts on this? Why would you think it better that they not have a choice? If that's not what you're saying, then what are you saying?"

-As I explained already at length in this very thread, I am not lobbying to pass legislation that would remove anybody's choice. I am simply expressing my own opinion that this particular choice is wrong and misguided.

I really hope I don't have to repeat this yet again.

Kimberly said...

It would have been nice if you'd actually have educated yourself on the topic of homeschooling before you posted such a thoughtless, uninformed opinion. At present, I am sitting at the local university while my son, age 12, participates in a rehearsal for an upcoming play. He also participated in two plays here last year. Yesterday, we attended a lecture about Shakespeare here. We do not "lock ourselves up at home" - on the contrary, my children are out in the community FAR more than students who go to school. We also volunteer in the community in numerous ways every week. As far as a good education goes (as well as good social skills), the research speaks for itself, and if you'd done your homework, you would know that.

Donna(mom24boyz) said...

In my opinion, public school is child abuse more so than homeschooling. You need to visit a homeschool coop and actually meet children who are homeschooled. They are amazing!!!

Anonymous said...

I guess it just goes to prove what a public ed.offers-narrow minded bigots.. way don't all of you just go buy an island somewhere and create your own "Brave New World" and leave the rest of us along.

Clarissa said...

It's been said fifteen times already that I did not go to a public school in the US. Can you people read?

And actually I did get myself an "island", which is this blog. You are the ones who keep coming here and inundating me with inane boring posts. I have not gone to a single one of your sites to insult, harrass and persecute you. Don't like what I'm saying? Feel free to go away.

Aren't people tired of posting the exact same stuff that has been said a gazillion times already within this very thread?

Booooooooooring!!!!

Anonymous said...

Boy, do I feel sorry for you. You an angry, intolerant, ignorant woman with nothing better to do than attack folks who think differently than you. I could refute every one of your ridiculous assertions, but I won't waste my time because you've chosen to live under a rock where government apparently knows best. But how about doing a little bit of research? Start with reading anything by John Taylor Gatto about the failures of public education. Then read this about the success of home education: http://www.hslda.org/docs/news/200908100.asp.

By the way, I have never left an anonymous comment on a blog before, but this one will be...because I don't want you getting anywhere near me, even virtually.

Anonymous said...

I'm sure you'll get the attention you seek with this ill-informed drivel.

Patrick said...

Wow - you may be the most singularly ego-centric and self-congratulating blogger that I have ever had the displeasure of reading.

And you're a professor? Good grief, I pray you don't teach anything of significance - your ability to think logically and coherently is frighteningly narrow for and educated person.

Don't worry - I'll be going away. I've wasted twenty minutes reading your blog and the inane replies to your posters, and I'll never visit this insipid tripe again.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the laugh!

kidsmomofmany said...

"Homeschooled children are disadvantaged in a variety of ways. They are robbed of academic success because all they are taught to do is answer the inane questions of standardized tests like trained little monkeys." Obviously you haven't met many homeschool families. The LAST thing we do is teach to standardized test. In fact, one of the reasons to homeschool is to help your child to learn to learn outside the box instead of to some stupid standardized test. I'm not going to bother to argue with you but...just remember that "free public education" you are referring to is subsidized by EVERY homeschooler in the USA that owns property. Then we also buy our own curriculum for our children out of our own pocket. Also remember that every homeschooler that you want to return to public school would raise the ration of students to teachers astronomically and likely lower the public school standards even more. Have a great day and try to open your mind a little. You have not idea what I do all day and most homeschool families, by the way, are taught by college educated mothers who chose to stay home and use their degree (often a teaching degree) to the advantage of their own children.

Anonymous said...

You remind me of the country song by Brad Paisley. I’m so much cooler Online.

Anonymous said...

You are a very sick woman, anyone who would make such ridiculous judgments must be poisoned in some way. I feel very sorry for you that you feel you can sit up there and judge all those around you. Enjoy your feeling of superiority and I will try not to laugh at you when you see the reality of reality. For the record, I do NOT homeschool at this time, so I am not just defending my fanatical beliefs.

Ellie said...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/41194608/

This is why parents homeschool. Publica education in this country is a sham.

Clarissa said...

"you feel you can sit up there and judge all those around you"

-Where is the "up there" located? Are you guys not noticing how you are making a really horrible impression with these rants?

There is no better argument against homeschooling than the unhinged behavior exhibited in this thread by homeschoolers and supporters.

Anonymous said...

I am going to keep this short. Your opinion of stay at home moms is wrong. In fact I have a teaching degree and would much rather teach my children at home then get payed to teach just for the test and if they forget it oh well. My children will learn to recall even later in life. Your whole opinion of homeschoolers in general is way off. I have read several of the comments and am so thankful that nothing will change the decision my husband and I have made in regards to our childrens education. There are some rare and obscure cases that homeschooling was done to hide abuse or other things. Unfortuantely those people give a bad name to all. Just like lumping us all in one category or another as to why we homeschool and what type of person we are. I pray that some day you will actually see the many benefits of homeschool and change your opinion.

Jenni said...

Biblical homeschool education is simply the best thing for the child academically, socially, and spiritually (see supporting links below).

The BEST education: "The home-educated typically score 15 to 30 percentile points above public-school ...students on standardized academic achievement tests. (The public school average is the 50th percentile; scores range from 1 to 99.)"
http://www.nheri.org/Research-Facts-on-Homeschooling.html

The BEST social environment: "The home-educated are doing well, typically above average, on measures of social, emotional, and psychological development. Research measures include peer interaction, self-concept, leadership skills, family cohesion, participation in community service, and self-esteem. "
http://www.nheri.org/Research-Facts-on-Homeschooling.html

The BEST spiritual training:"Christian producer and occult expert Caryl Matrisciana reports that 75 percent of public-schooled American youth brought up in Christian households disown their Christian faith by the first year of college. NHERI finds that this is only true for less than FOUR PERCENT of homeschooled youth. "
http://www.cbn.com/CBNnews/144135.aspx

Jenni said...

Some fine socialization taking place in public schools nowadays:

"Report mandated by Congress estimated that as many as 4.5 million students, out of roughly 50 million in American schools, (approx 10%) are subject to sexual misconduct by an employee of a school sometime between kindergarten and 12th grade. That figure includes verbal harassment that's sexual in nature…Most of the abuse NEVER gets reported…and many abusers have several victims. (2007)
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21392345/

"Thirty-one percent of high school students -- more than 4 million -- see drug dealing, illegal drug use or students high or drunk at least once a week on their school grounds.” (2007)
http://uk.reuters.com/article/idUKN1640311120070817

SO how are homeschoolers doing in comparison?

"In July 2000, the Discovery Institute, a Seattle-based think-tank, published an extensive report on homeschooling written by Senior Fellow Dr. Patricia Lines. She describes several controlled studies comparing the social skills of homeschoolers and non-homeschoolers. The homeschoolers scored as "well adjusted." In one study, trained counselors viewed videotapes of mixed groups of homeschooled and schooled children at play. The counselors didn't know the school status of each child. The results? The homeschooled kids demonstrated fewer behavioral problems. Dr. Lines' conclusion? "There is no basis to question the social development of homeschooled children."
http://www.discovery.org/a/3479

"Dr. Thomas Smedley believes that homeschoolers have superior socialization skills, and his research supports this claim. He conducted a study in which he administered the Vineyard Adaptive Behavior Scales test to identify mature and well-adapted behaviors in children. Home learners ranked in the 84th percentile, compared to publicly schooled students, who were drastically lower in the 23rd."
http://www.cbn.com/CBNnews/144135.aspx

In reality it is the parents who send their kids to public schools today that should be very concerned about their child's socialization. One former teacher would agree:

"It’s absurd and anti-life to be part of a system that compels you to sit in confinement with people of exactly the same age and social class. That system effectively cuts you off from the immense diversity of life and the synergy of variety; indeed it cuts you off from your own past and future, sealing you in a continuous present much the same way television does..."– John Taylor Gatto (1992 NY Teacher of the year)

Anonymous said...

Wow, this would almost be amusing, if it wasn't so sad. You quite obviously have no idea about homeschooling, and it's just rather pathetic to attempt to denounce a form of education you obviously are so uneducated about yourself. I feel sorry for you. Try looking up statistics, studies, and the like about homeschooling, and then rewrite your post. Until then, you just sound bigoted.

Clarissa said...

Lynn: you are welcome to come back when your attack of hysteria subsides. Until then, your comments will not be published.

Patrick said...

Against my better judgment, I perused some of your other blog posts.

And I must apologize - I judged you harshly based solely on your post/responses to this particular issue.

Your other posts don't seem so heavy handed, biased and one-sided. Why such venom reserved for this particular topic? If I may speculate, is it perhaps homeschooling is often initiated and carried out by the mother, and you have pre-disposed hatred for anyone who chooses a life of caring for their children? That is the only common refrain I can identify in your posts - that your brand of feminism necessarily means that choosing wife/mother/teacher is akin to abdicating your personhood?

Anonymous said...

You are obviously very clueless when it comes to homeschooling. It is sad to me when someone can be so close-minded and oblivious to something yet try to act like she just 'knows'. Embarrassing!

Yuck. That, to me, is racist!

adiaspeer said...

well, i'm not a religious homeschooler, racist or bored. just trying to do what i think is best for my kids. have you seen the public school system in NJ? yeah, didn't think so.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I tried to read all of the comments but was floored by the comments made by the writer of this blog. Who is ignorant, not the people who are commenting on the post but rather the author Clarissa.

TutorGirl said...

I don't have time to wade through all these comments! Let's just address a tiny slice of the original post: "A free, all-inclusive system of compulsory primary and secondary education"

Well no, as a matter of fact, those with the financial means have always educated their children outside of that system. You left out a homeschool group, one of the largest growing homeschool populations--the rich. http://www.nytimes.com/2006/06/05/education/05homeschool.html?scp=1&sq=homeschool%20tutor&st=cse

Also, high 90th percentiles on the annual standardized test for the kids I work with. They are bright kids of course, but not ridiculously so. We start "studying for the test" not at the beginning of the year, as you think, but somewhere around mid-April, and take it 2 weeks later.

What sort of research or even random googling did you do to come up with your rant?

Clarissa said...

Patrick: "Your other posts don't seem so heavy handed, biased and one-sided. Why such venom reserved for this particular topic? That is the only common refrain I can identify in your posts - that your brand of feminism necessarily means that choosing wife/mother/teacher is akin to abdicating your personhood?"

-In my case, I wasn't homeschooled by my mother, as I explained earlier, so I have no prejudice against mothers as such.

I do, however, have a serious issue with stay-at-home parents, spouses, relatives, partners, etc. I have had some extremely painful personal experiences in this area. I have read extensively on the issue as well. Finally, I have gone into therapy to deal with the trauma such experiences have caused me.

As a result, based on every single piece of personal, intellectual and anecdotal evidence I have been able to come in touch with I have arrived at a conclusion that stay-at-home relatives of any gender cause themselves and others incalculable harm. I wish I'd encounter any, and I mean absolutely any evidence contradicting my conclusions. By evidence, of course, I do not mean blog comments by people who purport being housewives/husbands, etc. gushing about how happy they are.

Thank you for your curiosity and politeness.

Clarissa said...

NO MORE COMMENTS THAT INCLUDE OFFENSIVE LANGUAGE AND INSULTS WILL BE PUBLISHED, SO DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME SUBMITTING THEM.

THANK YOU.

Anonymous said...

Praying for you right at this moment for you to know the true real meaning of homeschooling and know why parents homeschool their children. Why don't you post on you blog asking why parents homeschool. It may help have a better understanding.

Clarissa said...

For everybody's information:

"Cyberharassment. Cyberharassment differs from cyberstalking in that it is generally defined as not involving a credible threat. Cyberharassment usually pertains to threatening or harassing email messages, instant messages, or to blog entries or websites dedicated solely to tormenting an individual. Some states approach cyberharrassment by including language addressing electronic communications in general harassment statutes, while others have created stand-alone cyberharassment statutes."

http://www.ncsl.org/default.aspx?tabid=13495

Thoughts of THAT mom said...

You still haven't answered my question. I KNOW it is your opinion that one is inferior if he/she chooses to stay at home. I didn't ASK if it was your opinion. I asked WHY it was your opinion.

I also asked how you justified your stance based on the ACTUAL feminist stance which advocates parents (mom or dad) having a choice to stay home...and doesn't see either as a lesser person as a result of that choice.

Clarissa said...

Anonymous: unless you can provide a direct quote from me showing where I called anybody "inferior", I will ask you to remove yourself from the conversation as somebody incapable of processing simple information.

Your inane question on feminism has been answered 4 times within this very thread. Enter "third wave feminism" in the search box if you are still clueless as to the answer. I can't be expected to answer the same question 5 times in a row when people don't even read what they are responding to and just speak to the voices in their head that are calling them inferior.

Anonymous said...

Wow, all I can say is I do not agree with your opinion whatsoever. Secondly, praying that you see the true benefits of homeschooling Clarissa.

CC said...

Wow, I am having such a hard time believing this wasn't posted as a joke!
As a mother who has been researching and planning to homeschool since my daughter was born, I can tell you have had little interaction with homeschoolers.
I wonder what you would say about the unschoolers. (Most of which I can guarantee do not fit into your categories)

superfunmom said...

I was fascinated to see that you forgot to include me in your categories. Surely you couldn't be that uninformed as to miss an entire group during your extensive research.

My questions to you are, are you a parent and are you a professional educator? I only ask because I am both. I went to college and grad school to learn about the art of teaching, which at its best is facilitating the learning of students. I spent several years teaching in my local public school district. Then, I had my first child.

We decided to homeschool the kids for many reasons. One is that we live in the state ranked 50th in education. Another is that our area is too religious, to the point that our public schools have been overrun with vocal Christians. There are many more, but frankly, I don't owe you an explanation.

I highly recommend you read some Ghatto, Holt, and Robinson before you discuss this topic anymore. You are embarrassing other educated feminists (like me).

Clarissa said...

No, you don't owe me an explanation. In fact, I'd prefer it if you and your friends didn't leave any comments here at all. It's beyond annoying to get almost 300 comments all of which say almost exactly the same.

Does anybody have anything new to say? If not, please consider saving yourself time and trouble by not wiritng anything here.

Earth.W said...

Hmm, what about the endless conga line of children abused in schools be it physical, sexual or emotional?

Problem with majority of teachers nowadays is not only their anger, is how they bully their children. You talk about children getting an opinion of their own but I can't see you allowing your students the ability to think opposite to you without being called names.

You, Clarissa, are an example of the failing of today's education system. Such my youngest daughter who was violently abused at school while the teachers stood by and found the whole lot funny. When I complained, they sent police after me. Well, my children are home now and are now just starting to want to learn.

If you want your child to be abused, send them to school. It's amazing and sad at how many schools hate parents and children.

Anonymous said...

Well, I actually like the post, it's bracing, and I tend to agree that the stay at home parent idea isn't the best one -- it has a tendency to isolate that person, which isn't good.

I do have friends and other people I know who home school. Part of this has to do with the oppressive nature of public schools nowadays, which can resemble prisons and have the NCLB curriculum, which is mind numbing. The kids have a lot of activities with other kids, and they do go to classes: Spanish here, guitar there, and so on - and the parents are educated. It does take a certain kind of financial situation to accomplish this - one of these couples involves a mom with a part time job and a part time graduate program, so her time is flexible, and a dad who also has a really flexible work schedule. So yes, they are in a position to homeschool or "unschool" in a good way. I've also noticed that a lot of the kids who've been homeschooled in ways I approve of less, still come to public, secular universities like mine and do OK. All of these things make me more relaxed about it than I feel when I look at the actual agenda of some of the more conservative homeschoolers.

Then there were my friends in junior high, 3 kids whose parents took them out of school entirely to travel. So they had no high school, went to junior college next. Now one's a professor and two teach high school.

So with all this I've become neutral on the practice in reality, despite agreeing in principle with this post and feeling thrilled that someone would actually voice my own general views in such a resolute way.

Earth.W said...

Clarissa, I never even knew of your hate filled blog until I clicked on a link to come here today.

Since I'm here, if schooling is so good, then is it that most children leaving school today can barely read, write, spell, count, know about land formation and other stuff?

I'll tell you. Because children are used as little robot soldiers, filled with lies like the world melting so they teach selected information. If you as a child question, you're treated poorly by teachers.

Sadly, every time I see some hate filled rant against home schooling and the ranter bullies and other poor behaviour happens, such people are always teachers. Always. Neatly backed by the fact that bullying in the workplace is extremely high amongst teaching staff.

I am glad I home school. Your anger issues proves that you are not fit to even stand next to a child.

Clarissa said...

Then why have you been sitting on this blog for 4 straight hours, pressing the Refresh button like you are getting paid for it?

Don't like what I wrote? Feel free to go away and never come back. Why are you sticking around?

Some people are too weird.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry to hear that you had a bad experience w/a stay at home parent or relative. I think that is a shame and such a pity that it required therapy (but good for you that you turned for help). Obviously, I don't know what happened in your past, but it sounds like it must've been terrible for you. And for that, I'm sorry.

I was wondering if you could direct me to some of the research you've done in regards to the damage a stay at home parent/relative can do. I have started my own search, but honestly, have not gotten very far or come up w/any logical or concrete evidence that it is harmful. In fact, I have come up w/the opposite.

I understand that you would feel so strongly about this subject based on your personal experience with it, however, not everyone who is a sahm or homeschooler is doing it w/damage intended. I don't need to ramble on about that, but please don't put down an entire group of people based on your terrible experience. Many people are doing what's best for them, and they are happy, well-adjusted, and social. Unfortunately, there are those who are being abused.... but sadly, the same can happen in a 2-income, public schooled home as well.

Edna said...

I homeschool my children. I do not fit into any of the three categories you suggest.

I pulled my children out of the public school system for very viable reasons. Firstly, the public school system proceeded to "leave my child behind" and we are caucasian! My son was diagnosed with autism and ADHD. He has a variety of learning issues that the school was unable or unwilling to address. They only chose to look at the issues at which their "enlightened thinkers" chose to measure. Because of this, my son was 2 years behind in reading and 4 years behind in math.

Also, I just finished my degree two years ago. I fully planned to complete that degree either by working or obtaining higher education. I graduated summa cum laude of my graduating class in college, a public university; I attended public schools graduating in the top 5 of my high school class ....does this make me intelligent?

My children have the opportunities now to learn at their own pace and to feel confident in their abilities. We learn in a multitude of different environments and cultures. Public schools cannot and will not provide this kind of "enlightenment."

I suspect my children will go on to lead happy and full lives no matter what occupation or station they choose to have in their life. For the record, I also have two children who are in the public school sector. My oldest daughter is about to graduate from college and my next to the oldest daughter is a junior in a local high school.

Homeschooling isn't for everyone, but please, do your research. It is irresponsible to claim that this method is detrimental just because it differs from your beliefs.

Clarissa said...

"Firstly, the public school system proceeded to "leave my child behind" and we are caucasian!"

-And then I'll be told that homeschoolers are not racist. How horrible.

Clarissa said...

Everybody else: I don't want to transform this into the discussion of housewives, which has been discussed in many other threads of this forum.

If you need sources on the alarming rates of depression in housewives, search the blog or simply enter "housewives depression" into a Google search. You'll see more scientific studies than you'll have time to read.

This post will jump to the next page of the blog very soon, so I will probably not be abswering many more of the comments.

Before you post a comment, please note that there have been 300 already. Are you sure what you are trying to say hasn't been said already? Repeating the same inane statementfor the 50ieth time in a row makes a very bad impression.

Lisa said...

I'm so glad we live in a free country.

momma24 said...

Thanks for the great laugh!! What a satirical and funny post. I love it when people speak about things like this in such a facetious manner. I haven't laughed that hard at such nonsense in quite some time. Thank you!

Anonymous said...

Your ignorance is laughable at best.

At the very least, in your ridiculous grouping of homeschooling families, you should account for the percentage of parents who would send their children to a public school if it weren't for the district losing their accreditation. I homeschool because it is the surest way to give my children the best possible education.

Anonymous said...

I wonder why people are so afraid of others who think for themselves? Might I remind you of the first sentence in Kant's essay of Enlightenment: "Enlightenment is man's emergence from his self-incurred immaturity.” This immaturity is not the lack of knowledge, more so the lack of courage to express one's self without the guidance of another.

"There is hope that the entire public could become a force of free thinking individuals if they are free to do so." -- I believe this is what homeschooling allows children to do, unlike the conformity and standardization of public institutions. Children are able to express interest in a particular subject and are encouraged to explore and learn based on their interests. Have you ever seen or heard of that in a public school?

I did go to a great public school 20 years ago, however, I failed to thrive. I didn't like people telling me what I had to read and when I had to read it, regardless if it interested me. I rediscovered my love of learning when I enrolled myself in college, thankfully.

I'm not trying to change your mind on your opinion, just trying to open it up a bit. You obviously are entitled to think what you will. I do applaud you on sticking to your word throughout this discussion, however ignorant it may be.

danielle said...

The more I read your comments, Clarissa, the more I wonder how you think you are the well-adjusted and intelligent person is this horribly one-sided conversation.

You are rude and you insult many commenters for sharing their opinions. One of the things I learned in school is that all peoples' opinions are to be respected and weighed equally, whether they agree with your views or not. You have not done this, and as such, I feel that you are the one that is "crippled intellectually and socially."

I conclude with a simple statement that I am saddened by your blog and your lack of research.

Clarissa said...

"you are the one that is "crippled intellectually and socially"

-Absolutely true. It's the result of homeschooling, you know.

You people are such geniuses it isn't even funny.

Kimberly said...

I have done the search you suggested on depression and housewives. Where is all this overwhelming research? I have yet to find anything recent and north American. Furthermore, I have found only flawed studies which do not take into account socio-economic status, which is the highest indicator for depression!

Clarissa said...

Seriously? So you don't know how to use the Internet either? That's sad.

Here are some examples that I hope you'll find suitably American and recent:

"•Depression affects twice as many women as men, regardless of racial and ethnic background or income.

•Depression is the number one cause of disability in women.

•In general, married women experience depression more than single women do, and depression is common among young mothers who stay at home full-time with small children. "

http://depression.emedtv.com/depression/depression-in-women.html

"Housewives experience a higher levels of depressive symptoms than other married women."

http://books.google.com/books?id=vyznyDj1Z8MC&pg=PA135&lpg=PA135&dq=housewives+depression+statistics&source=bl&ots=ACQkF1f3JH&sig=xU9mQKq_ZDsXiGjbtd7eZDH6ejQ&hl=en&ei=weM8TbqtLMH58AaG-ayNCg&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=4&ved=0CDoQ6AEwAw#v=onepage&q=housewives%20depression%20statistics&f=false

"more and more housewives are diagnosed with some form of depression. There are both social and biological factors that cause depression in housewives.
.Confusion
Over the past decades, the role of the woman in the home has changed. Many housewives become depressed because they are confused just what role they play in the home."
.

Read more: Housewives & Depression | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/facts_6309020_housewives-depression.html#ixzz1BusPyusq


DEPRESSION AND THE SOCIAL DIMENSIONS OF THE FULL-TIME HOUSEWIFE ROLE†

http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1533-8525.1986.tb00269.x/abstract

Depression among housewives: http://www.iamindepression.com/blog/depression-among-housewives/

Clarissa said...

"Scores of moms I know relinquish work to stay home with little ones but are dissatisfied or frustrated a good portion of the time. They are clumsy introducing themselves, half-mumbling what they used to do for work in a previous life, or resorting to a browbeaten "Just a mom." Shut inside with two children with chicken pox for a week, I understand how very desperate the situation is for them, how on-the-precipice they feel, even though their husbands don't often recognize it. "

Read more on FamilyEducation: http://life.familyeducation.com/mothers/baby/40200.html#ixzz1Buu4AbID

Whatever the reasons are, there are a lot of women spending a long part of their days alone at home. Or they spend most of their time with their little children, too young to go to school. Many of these women are exposed to a serious mental condition, depression.

The routine of a job that is not monetary rewarded makes difficult for stay at home women to perceive that they are doing a real job. They could feel useless and dependent, mostly if they had a remunerated work before. It is very hard to ask for money to buy the necessary things the household needs, and ask for money for the own personal expenses is worst.

The way some women react to these dependency feelings is focusing in the housekeeping in a compulsive way, to justify their lives. Others literally fell in a depression that makes them becoming more lonely and disgusted about themselves. The sadness and emptiness become so huge that physical disorders appear, as eating problems, overweight and even serious diseases.

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1081655/how_to_fight_stay_at_home_moms_depression.html

Kimberly said...

Link #1) From "emedtv" has absolutely zero citations on any study. Therefore it is only opinion and has no provable basis in fact
Link #2) A page from a book citing studies from the 70's and 80's = ancient history, not current
Link #3) from "ehow" not a single study is cited - therefore this is just opinion and is not provable
Link #4) This is a study from the 80's again, i.e. not current
Link #5)from "iamindepression.com" ZERO citations once again!
Link #6) cites a study from Holyoke College - 53% frustrated/depressed working women vs. 58% housewives = NOT statistically significant!
Link #7) ZERO citations yet again! (Did you actually read this article? I'm pretty sure it would insult your feminist sensibilities)

https://ojs.lib.byu.edu/spc/index.php/IssuesInReligionAndPsychotherapy/article/viewFile/403/381
"An excellent SUMMARY OF THE LITERATURE linking employment and
mental health of women is presented by Marshall et al. (1992) who reported that a majority of the studies reviewed have not found a relationship between employment and the mental health among married
women. The few differences reported revealed that employed women have slightly better mental health than do housewives. An important intervening variable to emerge from two of these studies is the wife's desire to work and the husband's support for her so doing. Thus, if employment status is consistent with preference and support, mental health is enhanced."

Clarissa said...

Housewives may also be predisposed to depression because they have less economic power than men and become exhausted

etd.library.pitt.edu/ETD/available/etd-08012007.../kimji071007rev.pdf

"Results (1) show that when gender, occupational prestige, and adult roles are disentangled, the gender difference in depression disappears; and (2) offer strongest support for a “paucity of roles” explanation, suggesting that a lack of multiple outlets for pleasure and support leads to symptoms of depression. Women may have traditionally been reported to have higher rates of depression because, in the past, they have typically been limited to one role—that of housewife. The potential benefits, for both women and men, of functioning within multiple roles are discussed."

http://www.atypon-link.com/GPI/doi/abs/10.1521/jscp.1984.2.1.57

Clarissa said...

"WHETHER THEY ARE PROFESSIONAL OR BLUE-COLLAR WORKERS, WORKING WOMEN EXPERIENCE LESS DEPRESSION THAN HOUSEWIVES. . . WOMEN WHO HAVE NEVER WORKED HAVE THE HIGHEST LEVELS OF DEPRESSION. wORKING WOMEN ARE LESS SUSCEPTIBLE THAN HOUSEWIVES TO MENTAL DISORDERS BIG AND SMALL. . . THEY ARE LESS NERVOUS AND PASSIVE, REPORT LESS ANXETY AND TAKE FEWER PSYCHOTROPIC DRUGS THAN WOMEN WHO STAY HOME."

http://books.google.com/books?id=5I-qlHF3DskC&pg=PA53&lpg=PA53&dq=housewives+depression&source=bl&ots=AZnaWW8QoY&sig=aQMPy_UvrwdlN9XGR7G0QoylW6Q&hl=en&ei=fP88TefwHMWt8AbczdS_Cg&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=4&ved=0CCoQ6AEwAzhQ#v=onepage&q=housewives%20depression&f=false

The bibliography in this book is a mile long, but I have no doubt that the housewives who have been bugging this blog for lack of anything better to do will remain unconvinced. Which is not surprising.

Clarissa said...

Women who work outsude the home show lower levels of depresison when compared with housewives.

http://books.google.com/books?id=d9lhBw8t410C&pg=PA148&lpg=PA148&dq=housewives+depression&source=bl&ots=LwUQiwBZkK&sig=bbecy2wsZJ7PPSxiLVOoDKuFATc&hl=en&ei=jwA9TeLiNsL38Abc1JnvCg&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=2&ved=0CBwQ6AEwAThk#v=onepage&q=housewives%20depression&f=false

Clarissa said...

Results showed a positive correlation 0.511 between the scores of anxiety and depression. It was also found out that most of the liver patients were experiencing anxiety (n=73, 71.6 %) and depression (n=72, 70.6 %). Negative correlation -0.335 was observed between years of education and depression while housewives were found to be more anxious than people doing jobs.
Hepatic housewives scored higher on anxiety scale than hepatic patients doing service. Higher levels of anxiety in housewives might have been indicated because women in households running family affairs assume a great responsibility on themselves that enhances anxious feelings in them. They might tend to magnify any threats to their health or it may be because they believe more in the myths spread about hepatic diseases.

http://www.jpps.com.pk/display_articles.asp?d=230&p=art

Clarissa said...

"share. Promotion of these drugs by drug manufacturers exploded. Where there had been a surge in the diagnosis of anxiety, now the diagnosis of the decade was ‘depression.’ Housewives by the droves needed and demanded antidepressants and even more tranquilizers. If one was good, two must be better. The pill craze was on."

http://www.cchrint.org/2010/09/08/the-huffington-post-psychotropic-drugs-our-children-and-our-pill-crazed-society/

I'm bored now but there are millions more. The phenomenon has been studied all over the world and is well-known everywhere. Of course, in such patriarchal, unprogressive societies as the US there is a strong propaganda supporting traditional gender roles, coming especially from fundamentalist religious circles. There are still tons of American sources on this but the shrill hysterics that have descended on tis blog recently will surely not want to listen.

Anonymous said...

You speak of how horrid homeschooling is and yet show little knowledge of the subject and try to categorize "all" homeschoolers into 3 groups.

Where do I fit into these groups?

I do homeschool both of my children.

But I am not a religious fanatic, I am in fact Pagan and go out of my way to find secular curriculum.
My husband is Christian but is open minded. My children have been exposed to church as well as have been allowed to explore other religions.

I am not racist, in fact, my husband, my sons and I have friends from many different ethnic backgrounds. We have family members in interracial relationships and get along with them very well.

Also I have a full time job, my husband also works full time.

We are far from being anti-social. We have 4H, football, Co-op, field trips, music lessons, swim team, soccer, park-days, as well as time spent with friends. My oldest son arranges his own time with his friends, where the only involvement I have is to approve/disapprove and drive him to whichever friend's house he may be going.

We have segmented lesson time to work on specific subjects. But we also have free time where the kids choose what they want to do. Some of which are playing video games, riding horses, playing outdoors, reading books, playing family games, riding bicycles, playing basketball, listening to music, or whatever else they may decide to do.

Both boys are very well rounded for a 6yr old and a 13yr old.

So once again how do I fit into one of your 3 categories?

Anonymous said...

When I was teaching in a public high school, there was a fellow teacher whose children were homeschooled. On teacher workdays, the middle-school aged son would sometimes accompany his dad and spend the day at school hanging out with the teachers. We were all impressed by him. His conversation just flowed with the adults and he was comfortable and confident and intelligent. He was not at all like the hundreds of kids we dealt with all day long, all year long. How was this child not intimidated by being in rooms full of teachers? How could he be so genuinely polite and considerate? It was my first encounter with a homeschooled kid, and clearly it's one that stayed with me.


Now it's a dozen years later and I have a 10 y/o son who has never been to school who is uncannily like him....

Somewhere along the way I went with the instincts that by biologically having a child, I was blessed with. The more I went with the instincts, the clearer they spoke to me and guided me. For example, by breastfeeding--which felt right to do--hormones release which make you feel more bonded to your baby. So, therefore, I felt so bonded to the baby, I did not want to place him in day care and go back to teaching. Therefore by staying home with my baby, I felt more connected to his needs, that I did x, and y, and z....For me, homeschooling was a natural progression based on following what was clear to me at the time what was best for my child. You see the things you are doing "working" for your child and you continue on that path.

Of course, I had the experience of having worked in a public school, which provided the contrast to make the right choices for my family. In my years of teaching---and this will come as a surprise to no one reading this---there is very little actual learning that takes place. The kids want nothing more than to have a free day (who can blame them?). Their main objective is to "get out of" lerning. Their favorite days are when there is a substitute. As a teacher I was as much a police man and doer of paperwork than anything. And I was a very dedicated, hard-working, caring teacher. I loved the kids. But nonetheless, kids were in a world of social survival and that was what it was overwhelmingly about.

I think most parents choose to do what they think is best for their children. I respect their rights, and I appreciate the respect in return.

In closing, I quote ALBERT EINSTEIN:

1) Education is what remains when all what was learned in school is forgotten.


2) It's a miracle curiosity survives a formal education.

Patrick said...

I've enjoyed the commentary on this blog, as it appears to have generated a fair bit conversation.

You seem a little distressed that the topic turned to housewives instead of homeschooling, but that is your own fault for a few reasons:
1) Your initial grouping of 'those who homeschool' was really only two groups, not three. The first two categories (religious and racist) should really be classified as xenophobes. As I'm sure that some homeschooling decision motivated by xenophobia, there really isn't much to argue there.
2) The third group was a direct attack against a particular segment of society. As you deliberately try to demean and demonize their choice to be stay at home mothers, you shouldn't be surprised that you will get a response.
3) Your responses to those mothers was short, abrupt and dismissive. You, yourself, are engaging in a discriminatory class warfare, which looks remarkably like racism, where you summarily dismiss the opinions, feelings and rights of those who choose to live differently than you.
As a university professor, you should be more acutely aware that your opinion will carry significant weight with people - and as such, you have a professional obligation to recognize that your opinion does not make something necessarily true. Nor does repeating your opinion make something necessarily true.
You should also take great care and learn the difference between correlation and causation. I would try and explain it to you, but I think it would be more beneficial for you to research that on your own.

Clarissa said...

Patrick: as I have explained already MANY times, this blog is not part of my professional activities. It's something that I do for fun. Thia is why it's anonymous. I don't have any professional obligations to the readers of the blog because the blog is free. I can't possibly have professional obligations towards those who aren't paying me.

This is MY blog. MY space where I express MY opinions. I'm neither forcing nor asking anybody to come here. I understand that many people will not agree with my opinions on a variety of subjects. That is perfectly fine. They should feel free not to visit the blog just like I'm not visiting theirs.

But trying to silence, persecute, stalk, threaten and harass a person just for having an opinion? In none of the other controversial topics have I seen that happen. This is something that only homeschoolers do when they are upset.

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